Saturday, May 17, 2008

Living and Loving and Laughing All the Way

My anniversary is Thursday. I talk a lot about my husband, about my marriage and my family. It’s something I cherish above all else; something I once thought I would never have.

I’m proud of the fact that we have made it work for 15 years. Holding a marriage together is work, no matter how committed the individuals that make up the couple are. I’m nowhere near perfect, although Gary is pretty close.

One of the things that has helped us is our sense of humor. It’s a weird one, but it’s there. It has gotten us through some rough patches, over some bumps and bruises, and just generally made things go better all along.

There will always be some sadness and turmoil in any marriage. Just living life brings times of sorrow. Being able to smile in spite of the pain, to laugh with your partner through the tears, is a precious gift. Gary can turn my tears to laughter. He helps me remember that it is possible to deal with what is happening but maintain a good attitude in the process.

I was doing something the other day that I routinely do. I won’t tell you what because it would embarrass my mother and prove that she absolutely failed at raising a proper daughter. My husband, unique individual that he is, believes that it is not only okay, but good and proper.
When he saw me doing it, he commented that I was "such a good mother" to which I replied that no, but I was at least adequate. I mentioned that if my grandmother saw me, she would be coming out of her grave to reprimand me. Gary replied that with the two of us, both of our grandmothers would do that on a routine basis.

We agreed that it didn’t matter, it worked for us and that was what mattered. This, to me, is a real blessing. A man that believes, however misinformed, that what I do is right and beneficial. I know he should know better, but I just count my lucky stars and go along with a smile on my face.

My sister Teresa celebrated her 26th wedding anniversary last week. She knows a thing or three about having a happy marriage. Except for mine. She keeps wanting to interfere with mine. I keep wanting her to keep her nose out of what I think is a perfect situation.

Teresa has a good natured issue with Gary’s habit of buying gifts for me. He tends to buy them months too early, then go ahead and give them to me. When the holiday rolls around, he usually goes and buys another gift, although I remind him he has already bought me something.
My sister thinks she needs to have a long talk with Gary. I think she needs to leave him alone; although I have offered to let Gary have a long talk with her husband if she would like.

I know others have been married longer, but 15 years is a good start for me. I have many faults and flaws and failings, so for someone like Gary to survive someone like me for that long is a true sign of his character.

I’m looking forward to the next 15 years. I’m having the time of my life, loving and living and laughing all the way.

No comments: